Sunday, April 24, 2011

“Look—we all know I’m more fun.”

“I had a feeling you’d be back.”

“Books are for nerds.”

“Let’s not point fingers here—I know you were watching Jersey Shore last night.”

“Since when did YOU get arms?”


  1. ooo, one of the new yorker ones was actually funny this week, although it can still be improved upon:

    "It's time I told you—you were adapted."

    change to:

    "It's time someone told you—you were adapted."


  2. yes! also, just had a thought:
    "I'm sorry, it's just that Kindle is so much thinner and better-smelling."

    OR (descending further into non-sensical)
    "Is that a Kindle in your pocket, or are you really just that unhappy to see me?"